Monday, July 14, 2008

Smells like Decomp

I am a huge fan of all the CSI shows, no matter how ridiculous they are (does the medical examiner really wear designer duds and spiky heeled shoes when arriving at a crime scene?) I love when the beautiful women just crinkle their cute little noses and say "Smells like decomp" like they're sniffing roses. I've always wanted an opportunity to do the same (not that I really wanted to find a dead body or anything, just looking for the right moment to use the line) and now I've got it.

We have a mystery stench. Something that smells so badly that is just has to be something dead. Smells like decomp. But we can't find the source. We've narrowed it down to the laundry room, but for all my sniffing and poking around, I cannot find the dead thing. We're guessing dead lizard, only because that's a pretty common thing here, but with the power of this smell, we could have something a little bigger on our hands. But oh, if only we could put our hands on the stupid thing and get it out of here! The cats are being no help at all, they take one whiff and go running. We've sealed off the room to our best ability, but it seems to seep through the cracks, forcing me to burn incense to keep the stink at bay.

If only I had one of those fabulous CSI "sniffers", the magical machine that can scout out a smell and tell you what it is in seconds flat. Then I could put on my fancy suit and my Jimmy Choos and say "We've got a body!", get a manicure, do the autopsy and be done with the whole thing. Cause of death? Kitty-cide most likely!


Anonymous said...

It's between the walls !!

Anonymous said...

Could be a possum. My dogs regularly make short work of possums.

I'm addicted to those CSI and forensic pathology shows, too! Once I was watching and said aloud, "Man, I want to go to school and become a forensic pathologist." My darling bf replied, "Give me a break, Heather. You throw up from smelling bad food in the fridge."

He has a point.

Theresa in Mèrida said...

Trust me, a little nose wrinkle is not what happens when you smell a decomposing body. It's,umm,a memorable smell. You never ever want to have to use that phrase.
Are your walls solid? check the vents and inside the dryer. Look for cracks where something could have squeezed in.Hopefully you will find the thing and remove it, or it will finish decomposing on it's own.
Yuck, I don't envy you.

Anonymous said...

Check under the washer and dryer for dead lizards. For being so small they sure can make a hell of a stink!

My cats love to bring me dead lizards as gifts and Ixte likes to hoard the tails and other parts under the sofa. I did the same cute-nose-wrinkle-I-smell-decomp and found dead lizards- I'll just say plural and leave it at that! lol

Man, I must just be used to it cuz I didn't smell anything at your place! Wow, that is sad for me! lol

JoAnne in CT said...

Sounds like one of the boys didn't quite kill something (lizard?) enough, and it crawled under the washer or dryer to die with dignity!

That decomp smell is unmistakable. We've got lots of deer that get hit in the road around here, and those that don't die on impact drag themselves to the woods off road, then die. Three hot summer days later? Whooeeee! If you've got your windows down in the car, you'll be yellin' Ralph in a matter of seconds!

Hope you find the source soon! It's a baaaaaad smell for sure!

Islagringo said...

I hate it around here when I smell decomp and know it didn't come from me!

Susan Lechuga said...

You will find it I am sure. I do not envy you at all. At least your boys protect you.

Mimi said...

I'm with Teresa on this one, I'd check the dryer hose. Had the same problem in our laundry room in California once. Wound up being a wood rat in the dryer hose. OMG, every time I dried the clothes I cleared the neighborhood!
Good luck sweetie. OH, and all god pathologists use a bit of Vics menthol on their upper lip.
Your welcome (Grin)

Beth said...

Oooooooh, if Warrick Brown (Gary Dourdan) shows up to look for the "decomp" give me buzz and I'll be on the next flight!!

That is one SERIOUSLY sexy man!!!!

CancunCanuck said...

CSI KW- Solid concrete walls, hard to get in there but a good first guess in your investigation!

CSI Heather- Possums do get in the laundry room (I think they're cute, Hubby screams like a little girl, haha). Buuuut, we've checked EVERYWHERE a possum could possibly hide a body and it's just not there! Pretty sure it's a lizard. There is a BIG ole possum hanging around our yard at night right under the windows, wish I had night vision on my camera to get a pic of the little bugger. Maybe you and I can be pretend CSI's for a day, but only for cases that don't have any yucky smells.

CSI Theresa- I don't think I ever really want to smell a body decomposing, that would be too much for me! Yep, solid walls, checked the washer, dryer, hoses, drains, can't find the little bugger. The smell seems to be diminishing, hopefully it's almost done with it's little process.

CSI Lisa- Checked and double checked, no findy! You didn't smell it cause I burned incense before you got here then used the Jedi mind trick to make you think you were smelling roses, haha.

CSI Joanne- Ewww to dead deer smell! Keep those windows up in the summer time!

CSI IslaGringo- You've got a few years yet before you start to rot, LOL!

CSI My3Ros- I think we'll never find it and it will remain "mystery stench" forever and ever, lol.

CSI Mimi- Ewww to wood rat in the dryer hose, poor neighbours, lol! We've checked it, whatever it is had made itself invisible to us but I guess it will go soon. I love the Vick's trick, it comes up in the "documentary" style crime scene shows and all my murder books, but I guess it's not sexy enough for CSI! :)

CSI Beth- What?? You think I would share Warrick Brown??? LOL! Just kidding, though I get first dibs, then he's all yours. A little Danny Messer from CSI New York wouldn't be hard to take either. :)

Anonymous said...

I've got a photo of my husband arm wrestling with the actor that plays Warrick!!!!!!! I really do. What a frickin' hottie he is.

I had a major dead-stinkola in my car once, turned out to be a tiny itty bitty piece of dead-thing-gunk that came in on the bottom of someone's shoe. It was minuscule, but stinky.

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